Married Life - makes my eyes tear up, such a happy ending...

A couple had only been married for two weeks and the husband, although very
much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old
buddies.
So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."
"Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.
"I'm going to the tavern, Pretty Face," he answered. I'm going to have a
beer."

The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the
refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12
different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan,
India, etc

The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that hecould think of
saying was, "Yes, Lollipop... but at the tavern...You know... they have
frozen glasses... " He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife
interrupted him by saying, "You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?" She took
a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills
just holding it.

The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the
tavernthey have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious...I won't be
long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"
"You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?" She opened the oven and took out 5
dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets,
mushroom caps, and little quiches.
"But my sweet honey... at the tavern.... you know there's swearing, dirty
words and all that..."

"You want dirty words, Cutie Pie?
LISTEN UP CHICKEN SHIT! SIT YOUR ASS DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR
BEER IN YOUR FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE
YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN'T GOING TO A DAMNED TAVERN! THAT SHIT IS OVER, GOT IT,
JACKASS?"

.and they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet
story?